Who is to blame?
A typical feature of abusers is that they never assume responsibility for what they do.
They put the blame on
- alcohol
- a bad childhood
- stress because of work / unemployment
- the victim
A victim often seeks the reasons for the beatings in her own behaviour. She can then hope to avoid the same mistakes in the future and thus stop the abuse. However, experience shows: an abuser will always find a reason - no matter what the victim does.